My Spouse or My Kids?

My Kids or My Spouse?

You married for love. You married forever. But you never expected your marriage would involve having to choose between your new spouse an...

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Just Breathe

  • Some days you just need to concentrate on breathing. When the demands get too many & the load gets to heavy, just breathe.
  • When the stepkids are getting to you; when your mate is frustrating you; when it's too much. close your eyes, relax, and just breathe.
  • Everything doesn't have to be perfect. Everything doesn't have to be immediate. Everything can pause occasionally.

Breathing is terribly underrated. As basic as it gets, and yet so very vital. Focus on breathing in, then out. Just breathe for a bit.

  • Far too often, we ALLOW the world and demands on us to determine our pace. CHOOSE to slow down. Just breathe.
  • If you don't set a manageable pace, you will run out of breath before the end. Slow down and do things right. Just breathe.
  • Rushing around does NOT get more accomplished. It just confuses your soul. Focus on one thing at a time. Just breathe.
  • Life was never meant to be so damaging to your soul. God promises to lift your burden if you ask. Just breathe.

"Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke fits perfectly, and the burden I give you is light." (Matthew 11:28-30)

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

New SC! Report on Children of Divorce

COMING SOON! ... A brand new Special Report for parents and stepparents of Children of Divorce. I'm working frantically on finishing up a new vital resource for second families which details how to help your children overcome the challenges of divorce and succeed at moving on. I hope to have the full report ready in just a couple of weeks.

Meanwhile, here's a snippet to let you see where I'm going. This is from my working notes, so remember that the final will be more polished. But I want to let you know what the report will cover - and to get your feedback.

If you have any suggestions, or any questions you'd like addressed in the final report, NOW IS THE TIME to let me know. Just use the "Comment" function at the end of this article if you have any thoughts to share about the topic of helping children survive divorce.

STEPcoach

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A few basic tips regarding your Children:
  • Assure your children that both parents still love them, regardless of changes in the parent’s marriage.
  • Assure your children that the divorce was not their fault in any way (most children blame themselves).
  • As much as realistically possible, tell your children the truth about upcoming changes in their lives, including living arrangements, school, sleeping arrangements, pets, toys, visitation with family, etc.
  • Learn all you can about how divorce affects children emotionally, physically, and psychologically.
  • Listen carefully to your children’s questions, concerns, and fears. Never discount their importance.
  • Maintain as many routines as possible in your children’s lives (sports, hobbies, visits to relatives, etc.).
  • Never bad mouth your children’s other parent where the children can hear you — never.
  • Never use your children as spies or to carry messages to their other parent. 
That is not their job; it is yours. Their job is to be children.
What do you think? ...

More Toxic Toys recalled

This article lists 61 toys made in China that are being recalled due to safety issues, most because of toxic lead paint.
Here are a couple of the most scary:
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High School Musical Manicure Kits

Fantas-Eyes Inc., of New York, N.Y. has recalled about 15,000 High School Musical manicure kits manufactured in China because the glitter lettering "High School Musical" on the pouch that contains the manicure kit contains excessive levels of lead.

The recall was announced by the Consumer Product Safety Commission Jan. 27, 2009.

The 7 1/2-inch by 4 3/4-inch plastic see-through pouch has a pink zipper with "High School Musical" printed in yellow gold with glitter and "Sharpay" printed in dark red on one side.

The manicure kits was sold by LTD Commodities and ABC distributing catalogs and Web Sites and on www.lakeside.com from September 2008 to November 2008 for about $11.

Consumers can get a replacement pouch by contacting Fantas-Eyes at (800) 352-7419 between 8 a.m. and 5 p.m. ET Monday through Friday, or at www.Fantas-Eyes.com.

< NOTE: a manicure kit! How many kids have you seen chewing on their finger nails? So, they use the kit, transfer the paint to their fingers, then stick them in their mouths! GACK!>

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Muniré Crib and Matching Furniture

Muniré Furniture Inc., of Piscataway, N.J., is recalling 9,000 pieces of baby furniture, including 3,000 cribs, because red paint underneath the black top coat is laced with lead.

One child has already been diagnosed with lead poisoning after chewing on the crib, according to the Consumer Product Safety Commission.

The "Newport Rubbed Black 4-in-1" cribs and matching furniture are made of wood and have a rubbed black finish. Only the "Newport Rubbed Black" cribs and matching furniture manufactured in Indonesia between April 2006 and November 2008 are included in this recall. The model number, date and country of manufacture are printed on the label attached to the side panel of the crib and the date of manufacture is on the back panel of the furniture. Models listed below are included in the recall:

    Model No. / Name
  • 7900 / Newport Lifetime Crib
  • 7918 / Hutch for Combo & Double Dresser
  • 7915 / Mirror
  • 7908 / Combo
  • 7902 / Nightstand
  • 7907 / Conversion Kit for Lifetime Crib
  • 7905 / 5-Drawer Dresser
  • 7929 / Armoire
  • 7975 / Guardrail for Lifetime Crib
  • 7906 / Double Dresser
  • 7914 / Bookcase
  • 7901 / Newport Olde World Crib
< NOTE: So, will somebody explain to me why we are still having China build our kids' toys? GOOD GRIEF!>


Friday, January 23, 2009

Vegan Living: Gossip Girl's Vegan Joke

[from Huffington Post link]
UltraClassic said
"most vegan types I have seen appear weak and unhealthy and unable to fight their way out of a paper bag."

To which I reply:
"weak vegans? HA!" ...

* Ridgely Abele
Winner of eight national championships in karate
* Surya Bonaly
Olympic figure skating champion
* Brendan Brazier
Professional Ironman triathlete
* Peter Burwash
Davis Cup winner and professional tennis star
* Andreas Cahling
Swedish champion bodybuilder, Olympic gold medallist in the ski jump
* Chris Campbell
Olympic wrestling champion
* Nicky Cole
First woman to walk to the North Pole
* Ruth Heidrich
Six-time Ironwoman, USA track and field Master's champion
* Keith Holmes
World-champion middleweight boxer
* Desmond Howard
Professional football star, Heisman trophy winner

& many more at http://www.veganathlete.com/vegan_vegetarian_athletes.php

About Gossip Girl

Read the Article at HuffingtonPost

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

President Obama

I'll readily admit that I have not been Barack Obama's greatest fan. I have had serious reservations about his qualifications to lead the free world in such complicated and tumultuous times. And there were other issues I have voiced which caused me to lean away from his election. However, a visit with a dear friend yesterday has brought a whole new appreciation to my conservative IrishAmerican mind.

Miss Jonny is a bright light in so many people's day as she sits inside Walmart's front door, smiling and greeting everyone who comes in and teasing and calling to everyone who leaves, "Have a blessed day!" If I ever noticed that Miss Jonny is black, I can't remember, because her smile is so blinding it blocks out most of her face. My wife and Miss Jonny have become friends (as is typical with my outgoing wife), so we stopped by yesterday to say hello in our shopping stop on the way home. After the usual hugs and banter, Miss Jonny asked us what we thought of "her president Barack." I said something general like, it will be interesting to see how he does in office. Miss Jonny's eyes lit up and she said that she didn't care much for how he did, just the fact that he was in was a blessing to her and to us all. Then I asked her why.

With soft eyes and a softer smile, she said, "I grew up with segregation, you know. I have been blessed in many ways, but I've had people look down on me because of my color, too. When my son took me to vote, I couldn't hardly see to vote for the tears in my eyes. I kept thinking about my great-grandfather, my grandfather and grandmother, and my mama who didn't live - who never dreamed to live to see this day. Mr. Obama's election means that the young men in my culture have more hope to be part of this country we've helped build. Now, I ain't angry with anybody for anything ever done to me, but it sure is nice to feel like I and my culture are a welcome part of our own home country."

And suddenly I was able to understand the excitement felt by so many. Through Miss Jonny's words (we talked for over an hour) I came to see that Obama was, to many Americans, more than just one man with some qualifications (shaky or not), and with a peculiar background, and a daunting job ahead. He is a representative of ... well, darn it, hope and change. And while I hope he won't change too many things I love about America, I can see that some important changes have been made.

Of course, things aren't magically perfect in race relations. There is still prejudice to be dealt with. Humans are imperfect. But at least now we have a real opportunity, as a nation, to make the big changes we've, for some stupid reasons, hesitated to make. With one man's election, we've said that we are, at least on a national level, beyond petty bigotry.

I'll still be watching President Obama, and I'll still be praying for him to succeed in leading our country. But now I'll have a deeper reason to pray for his success. Because his success represents the growth of our national culture into much more of what our founding fathers alluded to as divine equality. It really does make me hopeful.

God bless America.

BC

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