Wednesday, January 28, 2009

New SC! Report on Children of Divorce

COMING SOON! ... A brand new Special Report for parents and stepparents of Children of Divorce. I'm working frantically on finishing up a new vital resource for second families which details how to help your children overcome the challenges of divorce and succeed at moving on. I hope to have the full report ready in just a couple of weeks.

Meanwhile, here's a snippet to let you see where I'm going. This is from my working notes, so remember that the final will be more polished. But I want to let you know what the report will cover - and to get your feedback.

If you have any suggestions, or any questions you'd like addressed in the final report, NOW IS THE TIME to let me know. Just use the "Comment" function at the end of this article if you have any thoughts to share about the topic of helping children survive divorce.

STEPcoach

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A few basic tips regarding your Children:
  • Assure your children that both parents still love them, regardless of changes in the parent’s marriage.
  • Assure your children that the divorce was not their fault in any way (most children blame themselves).
  • As much as realistically possible, tell your children the truth about upcoming changes in their lives, including living arrangements, school, sleeping arrangements, pets, toys, visitation with family, etc.
  • Learn all you can about how divorce affects children emotionally, physically, and psychologically.
  • Listen carefully to your children’s questions, concerns, and fears. Never discount their importance.
  • Maintain as many routines as possible in your children’s lives (sports, hobbies, visits to relatives, etc.).
  • Never bad mouth your children’s other parent where the children can hear you — never.
  • Never use your children as spies or to carry messages to their other parent. 
That is not their job; it is yours. Their job is to be children.
What do you think? ...

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